If and when you get pulled over be polite and honest – you’ve got nothing to hide, right? Present your ID and don’t be a jerk. After all, the last thing you want is to give a cop a reason to make your life (and his) and more difficult than it needs to be. With that being said, here are the things you should avoid saying at all costs …
“I pay your salary.”
Cops are public officials that get paid by tax dollars, but this does not make them indebted to you personally — regardless if you really did stop at that stop sign or weren’t lying when you told him/her that you set the cruise control. And besides this being downright rude, you trying to pull rank on the officer by essentially saying you’re his/her boss only ensures that you’ll be cut no breaks.
“Why me? How come you didn’t pull that guy over?”
Yeah, we know the speed racer in the yellow Civic was going faster than you were, but the cop caught you. Too bad. It happens. Asking why you were singled out doesn’t make you any less guilty of an infraction. And it’s not like the cop is going to say, “Wow, you’re right! Did you happen to see the plates?” Instead, keep your trap shut and listen up. Doing that may provide you with a hole or avenue to travel down that leads to you getting let off without having to pay a fine.
“Do you know who I am?”
Not only is there a strong chance that your status won’t make any difference, but It may also even make things worse. It’s embarrassing and, depending on how many other assholes the cop had a run-in with that day, might make him/her more prone to issue you a summons for more loot.
“I guess I was speeding, how fast was I going?”
This translates to: “I was driving distracted and not paying attention because the well-being of the other cars on the road and therefore the people inside of them means nothing to me because I’m super important.”
“I do not want a breathalyzer.”
Generally, this is a bad idea. Sure, you can downright refuse a breathalyzer. In most states, there’s a statute called “implied consent.” So, basically, when you show your driver’s license you can technically refuse a breathalyzer. Mind you, this could get your license suspended for up to six months.
“Not saying or doing anything without a lawyer.”
While asking for a lawyer is a safe bet there are some things you should be aware of. Getting hold of a lawyer is a tough thing in that particular moment and it may be some time before one arrives, which leaves more time for the officers to question you and suspect you further. Still, there are certain conditions when saying this is perfectly acceptable and you should do your best not to give up your basic civil rights that easily.
“Where were you hiding?”
“Oh man, where were you guys hiding?” may seem like an ice-breaker, but it can easily give the officer the wrong impression. Above all, it gets you nothing — cops don’t appreciate it and it’s not like they’ll tell you, anyway.
